My favourite books (and my unfavourites)
Critics are so pretentious, especially the ‘professionals’. Compiling these lists, or rating books, they feel the need to include all the ‘Classic’ authors. What a load of hogwash!
Okay, I admit that I am not a prodigious reader – I probably finish a book in about two or three weeks these days – but I have read a couple of books in my lifetime.
When I pick up a book, I can usually tell if it’s going to be something I’ll like just by scanning through. If most of the book is conversation, I chuck it. It’s frustrating most of the time trying to figure out which character is saying what, unless they have a distinctive style of speech.
Excessive description and complicated or hifalutin language seriously irks me – put the book down. What I need in a book is something that gets to the point and has clear modern language.
1) Green eggs and ham. Dr Seuss is one of my favourite authors, and is one of my earliest recollections of literature.
2) Enid Blyton’s Famous Five and Secret Seven. Adventure and intrigue is cool for anyone from age six.
3) Rudyard Kipling. I haven’t read much of his adult stuff, but the Jungle Book is one of my favourite movies, and the Elephant’s Child is hilarious. His Just So stories are fantastic, and his poems are inspired.
4) The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy (a trilogy of five). Douglas Adams. Find out about the meaning of life. Don’t watch the movie, though; it’ll ruin the whole thing.
5) Pillars of the Earth. Ken Follett. The story of building a cathedral in 12th century England.
6) Great Expectations. Charles Dickens. Don’t tell my eighth grade teacher, but this is one story that has stuck with me, even though I hated it at school.
7) The Power of One. Bryce Courtenay. Set in South Africa, the narrator is a boy who is sent to a boarding school. It shows his experiences of other cultures from a unique perspective.
8) Magician. Raymond E. Feist. A magician’s apprentice learns new magic which will affect two worlds.
9) Shannara series. Terry Brooks. Can’t remember what is was about, but it affected me at the time.
10) Mort. Terry Pratchett. Story of death’s apprentice. It’s quite hilarious, as are his other books about the Discworld.
11) Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Roald Dahl. His other creations, like Matilda, BFG and numerous others are unforgettable.
12) As the Crow Flies & Kane and Abel. Jeffrey Archer. All his books are good, characterisations are strong.
13) The Stand. Stephen King. Prodigious author. His latest stuff, though, is only for diehard fans.
14) Whispers. Dean Koontz. Terror horror adventure. Good stuff – most of his books.
15) Body rides. Richard Laymon. This guy scares me, and I’m not scared easily. Hard to stomach sometimes, though.
16) Asterix. Uderzo and Goscinny. I grew up on these animated ‘classics’ and I still think they’re hilarious.
17) The Source. James Michener. Historical books mixed with fictional characters. Amazing.
My unfavourite books
The following are books that I have tried to read, and couldn’t fathom terribly much.
a) The Lord of the Rings. JRR Tolkien. Boring, difficult to read and too many characters.
b) Pride and Prejudice. Jane Austen.
c) The bible. God. Terrible plot. The King James version was well written though.
d) Harry Potter. JK Rowling. Story was good, but the writing is horrible.
e) Wuthering Heights. Emily Bronte. Try and read her complicated verse.
f) Everything I haven’t read yet. A.non. If a tree falls in the forest and there’s no one around, does it still make a noise.
Well, that’s my opinion, anyway.
David Owen Nunes
David is many faceted, fascinating, fastidious, fair, fabulous and the other F word. He works in the Pensions Industry, plays occasional golf, and dreams of being able to write full time.
